This week, the prestigious Propeller Skies Fucktard of the Week™ award is personal. The following scene greeted me in the parking lot of my ghetto fabulous apartment complex this morning:

Merely scraping the bumper of an automobile is not enough to qualify one for the coveted Fucktard of the Week™ award. This Fucktard of the Week™ went above and beyond normal levels of idiocy by causing the following damages:

• Gouged bumper cover;
• Dented and scratched headlight assembly; and
• Scratched fender.

I realize with all the Safe Drivers of the Week™ and drunk drivers residing in my ghetto fabulous apartment complex it was only a matter of time before my Acura TL would be molested. However, I would have liked to make more than three fucking payments on the goddamn car. All five Prizzo Skeezy readers are invited to speculate on the estimated cost of repairs via the comments link. Hint: projector beam HID assemblies are not free.

[Update: the Fucktard of the Week™ did leave contact information. However, he took his sweet time returning Smoove D’s phone calls. Additionally, note or no note, crashing into a parked car automatically qualifies a person for Fucktard of the Week™ status - Ed.]