The following list summarizes the myriad reasons my Acura is better than any woman ever made:

It starts every time without protesting and requires only thirty seconds of warm-up;
The car responds to input quickly and without complaint or superfluous discussion;
Despite taking 91 octane gasoline, it is also much cheaper than a […]

A general tendancy here at the Prizzo Skeezy is to focus on the crappy aspects of living in Atlanta, resulting in an overwhelming tidal wave of negativity. Today, in contrast, it will be all kittens, flowers, peace, love, and other tree-hugging hippie bullshit.
One of the nice things about living in Atlanta is […]

As I was getting up to mix myself another Vesper, I suddenly heard a crash and a horn going off on the street outside my apartment. As the horn sounded like mine, I decided a quick investigation was warranted. I grabbed my Polaroid and some shoes and headed downstairs to see if some […]

Currently, here in the Dirty South, speculating about the impending bankruptcy of Delta is a popular topic of conversation. Personally, I think Delta deserves to go bankrupt because they fucking suck ass. Every flight I have ever taken on Delta, which would be about a dozen, has been delayed. Once, I even […]

Saturday morning I awoke at the ungodly hour of nine o’clock and headed down to the southside to scout some locations for an upcoming shoot. After wandering around the hood, finding a Trabant, and spotting one actual ghetto dog, I had enough material. I realize it seems unlikely anyone in Atlanta is rolling […]

As Cap’n Ken over at The Wisdom has noted recently, college football season has started. With that in mind, I dropped in to ESPN on line and discovered that Texas A&M is ranked 17th in the ESPN coaches poll. Additionally, an interesting article on ESPN pointed out that the Aggies are a potential […]

The south is like one giant dumpster overflowing with filthy, disgusting, immoral, and lazy white trash. A case in point would be my white trash neighbors, who once asked me for a jump, and also asked to borrow tools.
The other day, I arrived home to find my white trash neighbors had […]

Dear foreign fucktard in front of me in line at Publix,
First, hang up your goddamn cell and use both hands to place items on the belt. The hardworking cashier can scan them faster than you can load them with only one hand. Second, stop trying to scam the long suffering cashier with an […]

A few weeks ago I stopped by the West Egg Cafe for breakfast. Like every single other restaurant in Atlanta not located in a strip mall, it is a loft space in a converted warehouse. I ordered a full stack of blueberry pancakes and a cup of coffee. The pancakes were tasty […]

Since I have gotten quite a few dumbass comments from clearly retarded people recently, I think I need to have a little refresher course on how, exactly, comments work. Put simply, I rule. Stupid comments are held in moderation through the magic of spam filters. I then either delete them, or in […]