[The following post is brought to you courtesy of Labrot & Graham Woodford Reserve - Ed.]

I have been a big Syracuse fan for a long time. This year, they had a perfectly good basketball team. Therefore, I picked them to go to the Elite Eight. Unfortunately, they are a bunch of bitches and lost to Vermont. The state of Vermont is composed of tree-hugging hippe dope smokers. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but a team from my state should be able to beat them in the first round of the tournament. Instead, they got bounced like a bunch of douchebags. Fuck Syracuse. Bitches.

At least Syracuse got bounced by a school I have heard of. The fucking ass farmers at Kansas got schooled by motherfucking goddamn Bucknell. What the fuck? Is Bucknell a school in this country? ‘Cause I ain’t never heard of Bucknell! Fuck Kansas. Fuck all y’all. Bunch of goddamn bitches.